There's A Family Residing In Your Armpits

There's a family residing in your armpits.

They're smelly and rude and they give you the fits.

Their diets are grainy and hominy grits.

They're the family residing in your armpits.

 

 

There's a family residing in your armpits.

If you look you can see where the ugly one sits.

On the other side mama sits quietly and knits.

The family residing in your armpits.

 

 

There's a family residing in your armpits.

It's made up of juvenile delinquents and chits.

The old ones are crazy, the young ones are twits.

They're the family residing in your armpits.

 

 

There's a family residing in your armpits.

Their raucous goes on and on and never quits.

And all of their teens are covered with zits.

It's the family residing in your armpits.

 

 

There's a family residing in your armpits.

One boy wears pajamas. A little girl spits.

Some spry ones are often taught to do the splits.

In the family residing in your armpits.

 

There's a family residing in your armpits.

The dramatic and talented ones put on skits.

While mama's still knitting and turning out mitts.

For the family residing in your armpits.

 

There's a family residing in your armpits.

Some counter with creams and some counter with spritz.

It wipes out the odor and blasts them to bits.

So, there's no more residing in your armpits.

 

 

The Family of Cooties That Lives In Your Hair

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

Their color is light, like a peach or a pear.

Their tint can be different, they're dark or they're fair.

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

 

 

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

They're dad is a bum and he sits in the square.

They're  mom is depressed and she sobs with despair.

They're the family of cooties that live in your hair.

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

The young ones are selfish and don't like to share.

The teens go to parties and rides at the fair.

They're the family of cooties that live in your hair.

 

 

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

The grandma gets moody and goes on a tear.

The grandpa is furry and big as a bear.

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

Sometimes they have problems and need some repair.

Sometimes they have beauty that none can compare.

They're the family of cooties that lives in your hair.

 

 

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

The smart go to college and drive a corvair.

The dumb stay in middle school blowing hot air.

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

If the tough ones get angry you'd better beware.

But the wimpies are lazy and simply don't care.

They're a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

 

 

There's a family of cooties that lives in your hair.

When you brush your hair soundly you'll find they're not there.

If you wash with strong soap I can promise and swear

There'll be no more live cooties that live in your hair.

The Bothersome Family That Lives In Your Ears

There's a bothersome family that lives in your ears.
They itch and they tickle and prey on your fears.
They bother and chatter and drive you to tears.
The bothersome family that lives in your ears.

There's a bothersome family that lives in your ears.
They build great big dams of wax, and it appears
They always have pizza for every New Year's.
That bothersome family that lives in your ears.

There's a bothersome family that lives in your ears.
They drink lots of soda and frothy root beers.
The pitch of their singing will bring you to tears.
They're the bothersome family that lives in your ears.

There's a bothersome family that lives in your ears.
They have lots of siblings and odious peers.
Their radio blasting has gone on for years.
They're a bothersome family that lives in your ears.

There's a bothersome family that lives in your ears.
There's a tall one who drives and a short one who steers.
There's thin ones up front and there's fat in the rears.
It's the bothersome family that lives in your ears.

There's a bothersome family that lives in your ears.
They live off the cuff and have lofty careers.
They're known to play games and respond with loud cheers.
The bothersome family that lives in your ears.

There's a bothersome family that lives in your ears.
Their numbers are fading and will soon disappear.
They will long be remembered and their extinction nears,
As the bothersome family that lived in your ears.

Teamwork

When I come before Jesus each morning to pray,
I ask Him to "make me a blessing" today.
He says He will do it and always be there,
But, He's always expecting that I do my share.